What is nervous system regulation and why is everyone talking about it? Your guide to learning about how your nervous system can help you harmonize your mind, emotions, and body!
At a very young age we’re conditioned to disconnect from our bodies. We’re not taught the wisdom our bodies know and how to actually tune in and listen. We learn to suppress our body's signals, viewing pain, exhaustion, grief, and sadness as problems rather than natural human experiences. This disconnection hinders our ability to understand and listen to our bodies' messages.
As we mature, we tend to rely heavily on intellectualization to process our experiences. We analyze the past, recognizing patterns and rationalizing events—for instance, attributing our parents' behaviors to their own limitations. While this understanding can be useful, it is only part of the equation. Intellectual insight alone does not equate to emotional healing.
The crucial component of healing is allowing ourselves to experience and release emotions. Regardless of the time elapsed since the initial event, emotional processing is essential for letting go of past pain and trauma. Imagine the suppressed emotion as a ball of energy in your chest—simply justifying the past without acknowledging the emotion merely pushes it down, preventing it from leaving your body.
Creating a safe space for emotional expression enables us to connect with our younger selves and process their feelings. By embracing this vulnerability, we can begin to release long-held emotions and foster a deeper connection with our bodies. It is through this holistic approach that true healing can occur, bridging the gap between intellectual understanding and emotional well-being.
You might be saying to yourself, “Okay great. So how do I actually do this?”
Welcome to Nervous System Regulation.
With nervous system regulation, we learn to listen to our bodies' language, as they carry a wealth of wisdom from our lived experiences. By integrating the languages of the emotions (feelings), the brain (thoughts), and the body (sensations), we can develop a deeper understanding of ourselves and cultivate self-trust.
Being able to notice feelings and sensation is the first step in nervous system regulation. By identifying what feels uncomfortable and unsafe, as well as what brings comfort and safety, we can better understand our reactions to triggers and cultivate a deeper connection with our intuition. Enhancing nervous system regulation allows us to navigate the lasting effects of trauma more effectively. As we become more attuned to our body's messages, we can foster resilience, self-awareness, and healing, leading to a greater sense of balance and well-being in our daily lives.
From a young age, we’re taught to ignore our body’s messages. Children with high energy levels or difficulty sitting still—potentially self-soothing behaviors—are frequently labeled as hyperactive. Our education system primarily focuses on basic anatomy, disregarding the complex interplay between body, mind, and emotions. When we have symptoms or issues with mental health, the idea is to ignore the body and to repress symptoms. It’s no wonder we don’t listen to ourselves. It’s no wonder we mute our intuition. It’s no wonder we push ourselves past the point of exhaustion. Repressed emotions don't disappear; they emerge in our body and our reactions. The body is always trying to protect us. Cultivating body awareness and intuition can help us interpret these messages and foster greater well-being.
A regulated nervous system doesn’t mean you’re a robot. It actually means you can feel a spectrum of emotions (deeply) and allow them to come and go. It means that you still have access to conscious choice instead of habitual autopilot reactions.
Regulating your nervous system doesn't mean you're always calm or stoic. It means you can feel intense anger or sadness and respond in ways you don't regret later.
Regulating your nervous system doesn't mean you don't cry. It means you're comfortable crying, knowing it's your body's way to get into a parasympathetic state.
Regulating your nervous system doesn't mean you control what you feel. It means you can respond to how you feel instead of defaulting to your habit reactions.
Regulating your nervous system doesn't mean you act like a monk. It means you're comfortable feeling all human emotions.
Regulating your nervous system doesn't mean you never go into emotional shutdown. It means you can take space and re-engage when you're not over simulated.
Regulating your nervous system doesn't mean you’re anxiety free. It means you understand anxiety as your body's way of protecting itself from danger.
Regulating your nervous system means you are emotionally flexible, aware, and compassionate towards yourself.
If you are interested in diving deeper and learning more about the nervous system and how it impacts your emotions, your patterns, and your relationship, sign up for our FREE Wired for Wellness workshop coming up in May 2024.